rrrrrRRRRAAAAWWWWRRRR!!

This last week has been hell. Easily the worst week of medical school EVER. Yes, worse than week 1 of neurology (oy that was a horrible week). *barf*

The reason is this: the school has decided to change their approach to the curriculum, asking students to learn on case-based approaches rather than the traditional lecture/exam methods.

This sucks. Because I had the whole lecture thing figured out. I had a system. And only once did it actually fail me last year.

This week, however, every single thing I've done has been behind the 8 ball. And my Retarded Quotient has increased exponentially. Get up early? Not early enough. Solve my assigned case? Not fast enough. Organized the sea of documents pertaining to assigned cases? Hardly. Using the right databases to research my case? I'm told, "No." Learned necessary material? Not well enough. Adapted smoothly to the new regime? Yeah...no.

I do get it though. I know why they're doing this to us: all the literature shows increased long-term retention and better performance on the Board exams when students learn this way. And that's what we're paying some of the highest tuition premiums in the country for. Our course director--who, if only would don a dapper tuxedo and some tap shoes, bears an uncanny resemblance to Daddy Warbucks--informs us that, "We don't want you to be comfortable. You're supposed to be frustrated. And that will take you to better retention in the end. You'll be much better prepared for your clinical years."

I'm not sure I'd describe my emotional state this week as "frustrated" so much as "crazy and desperate." I'm trying to give this new approach time to work for me. The question is, will it start to work in time to pass the tests?

Needless to say, the vast majority of, if not the entire class, is a little miffed about these changes. Some are adapting more graciously than others. When my small group was engaged in a somewhat heated discourse about these changes with our course director, I tried to lighten the mood by joking, "Oh, so it's like chemo, huh? When you feel terrible, at least you know it's working."

And then no one laughed.