Drama Fest in Middle America

My best friend, Sara, lives in Wichita, KS. Now, I've been to Wichita--for Sara's 2003 wedding in the dead of summer--and there's not much to it. I was lost a lot. With no bodies of water, mountains, or even many trees to speak of, every intersection is a slight variation of the last, in a perfect 90 degree grid: The first intersection might reveal a bank, grocery store, gas station and big-box store. Usually, just the names of these amenities change at each intersection (i.e., Target, Safeway, Bank of America, Arco...then Best Buy, Albertsons, a credit union and a 76). Though sometimes, there might be a Starbucks mixed in there somewhere.

I was also sick a lot. When I walked off my plane at 10:30 at night, it was like walking into a hot, wet towel. Just like Miami but without the satisfaction of palm trees, ocean beaches or a night life to make up for the sensation of sweaty suffocation. At that point in my life, I'd never experienced such temperature extremes (God love Oregon). So the shock of exposure to 90+ degree heat with 90+% humidity while walking between air conditioned structures made me a wee bit whoopsy--and I was under a ton of pressure as Maid of Honor to not vomit all over the bride during the ceremony.

But that's Wichita (in the summer, at least): a sprawling and unremarkable landscape, loaded with big-box stores, chain restaurants and wide open skies. No tornadoes that I saw. Kinda humdrum.

But you'd never know that, talking to Sara on the phone. Her life brims with drama, as if she's living a script from "Desperate Housewives" or "Melrose Place". Within their own coterie and neighborhood, people are having illicit affairs with other people. People are embezzling money. People are unemployed but no one else in their life has any idea about it for years because they continue to dress up and leave "for work" every morning. It's exhausting for me and I don't even know these people!

Now, Matt works in the news/sports/entertainment industry and I go to medical school. Both are relatively small professions, that most people think rank anywhere from "cool" to "AWESOME!!!!", depending on their own personal Dork Factor. Yet, I don't think anyone would tune into a prime time episode of me working on Vivien or Matt chasing after perps--oh wait. People do do that last one.

Sorry, scratch that. Reverse it.

All signs point to the general public however, tuning in to the daily dramatics that are being lived by real people every day in America's Heartland. Wichita. Who knew?!

On an entirely different note, I have been known to occasionally wear my f/v Northwestern shirt to school. Thrice now, I've been asked why I love Albertsons so much.





Yeah....logo recognition FAIL.